Up in the Air

Well, I'm still here. Trying to figure out what is going on. I am having a lot of trouble getting out of this country and into the next. All of my plans are kind of swirling out of control. My original leave date was February 18th. Now it may be pushed back to the 27th. I feel like all of my expectations are flying past an open window and all I can do is watch. I am having such a stressful experience. But I know that one day I'll be able to look back and realize that the stress and the state I am currently experiencing was a large part of how much more I appreciated my actual trip. It is actually kind of funny to me that I am going though so much before I even come close to my departure. It's complete and utter insanity.

I have been craving to go lately. I get very excited about it a lot more often and I have been having dreams about my trip. I sometimes have dreams about going in an apartment overlooking the beach. Sometimes I am at school. I've even had dreams about surfing. There are two defining qualities about these dreams that are present every time.

• One is that the campus or apartment or beach is always the same. My mind has created a place based on internal foresight and expectations. I don't know what the campus looks like, I have no idea where I'll live, and I haven't seen the beach I'll be living near. It's odd how the mind moves ahead of itself. Ahead of everything that's even going on at the promise of what's ahead.
• The second feature of these dreams is that Jordan is always there with me. I think that is part of the reason I get so excited. My mind has created a world where Jordan will be sharing, first hand, my experience in Australia along with me. Unfortunately, that's not true, as he is in school here and will be studying the entire time I am away. I feel that tells me a lot about what I want and what I expect. I guess communication will be high and emotions will be raging. I will miss him dearly as I go and create a real and true representation of Australia as it is, and not as my mind expects. My perception will be corrected and my trip will take hold in a way I can only imagine. Excitement, compassion, and fear suck the air from my lungs as I hold out for the next chapter in my trip.

My colorful landing in AUS awaits...